Sometimes

So here's what, I realize that I have a tendancy to let my emotions rule my mouth a lot of the time. I'm not sorry for what I say because when I'm saying it I definately mean it, but I usually come to realize I could handle some things better. So yes, the whole diaper rash thing made me very angry, that's my baby and she's suffering for no reason, but I don't want her dad out of her life. I want her to have a dad and I want her to always know that he loves her and would do anything for her, but it's just so frustrating sometimes. I wish he had the least bit of respect for me, like maybe to tell me he's having another kid before he posts it on the internet or to listen to me and do what I say when it concerns our daughter. That's what I want, easier said than done apparently. So yeah, that's how I feel about that. In Ireland news today, she has a double ear infection and bronchitis! My poor baby, we started the antibiotics today and she seems better already, happier anyway. The cough is a heartbreaker though. 5 days of meds and then hopefully we'll be good to go. Still gonna go to her dads tonight, he's sick too, hopefully nothing too serious, as angry as he can make me, I would never want anything to happen to him, Ireland needs a father. So I hope he feels better. I think I'm gonna go get my tatoo tonight, I got a gift certificate for it for Christmas so yay, free tatoo. I'm gonna get Ireland's name of course, on my arm. I'll post some pictures when I get it done. Then of course the boy will come over when he gets off work since it's a no baby night. Haven't seen him for two days since we both spend our weekends with our kids. So yep, that's the plan for the rest of the day. Also I feel the need to add that this is not a dramatic blog for your entertainment ( you know if I'm talking to you) So either understand that this is my life and this is how I feel, or f off and don't read it. To the rest of you, you know I love ya'll.

I hate computers

So sorry, our computer is being a peice of shit and will not connect to any form of the internet so I am using the lab top which I do not enjoy, hence the lack of posting. So what's been going on. Christmas and New Years were awesome. I actually got off work at 9 nye (since it was suppossed to be my day off anyway) and went out with Bri to ring in 2009. Good times. Thursday was my birthday, went to council bluffs with my boy and we had a really good time. Actually won some money too which is a miracle. He got me two dozen roses which are gorgeous, and was really sweet. He said he asked for 27 (since I'm 27 now, ugh) but the woman at the flower shop said it was tacky and wouldn't do it, seriously what a bitch. Today it's back to work as usual. Ireland has been running a fever the last two nights, but she's not acting sick so I've just been using tylenol and cool baths. We'll see how tonight goes, if it gets to103 she's going to the ER, last night it was 102.7, I hope it's just teething since she has no other symptoms. Her diaper rash is finally almost gone. How did she get diaper rash you ask? Why two visits in a row her lazy father couldn't go out and get her whole milk so he just gave her 2percent. Awesome huh? You can't do that, it's like switching formula on babies, you DON"T do it. And my poor baby had to suffer for it. I don't trust him anyway but now to know that he actually doesn't take care of her really upsets me. Why do you even want to be in her life? I have bad anxiety when she's gone now, I really can't stand it. I don't know what to do. Maybe when his girlfriend has her baby (yes she's pregnant again) he'll just leave my daughter alone. Honestly I don't know what to do anymore. But I promise if he ever neglects my daughter again very bad things will happen. So yeah, she is 15 months old now and I can't even believe it. She is just a ball of naughty energy. She runs around yelling mommy all the time so I can watch her do all her cool new tricks. She has only used the vomit against me once this year, on a 4 hour car trip. But please somebody tell me, HOW CAN I GET HER OFF THE BOTTLE? It is a nightmare. She'll take sippys but when she wants the bottle she will throw her sippy at me and throw tantrums until I give in, yes I give in I don't know what to do, she wears me down. So yeah, please help me. Gotta run, someone is very demanding today.